Monday, July 21, 2008

My Big Boy is gone

Last Sunday morning I lost my Alaskan Malamute of 12 years. It was very sad. And very unexpected. Just wanted to post a picture of him. He had a tumor and had become suddenly very sick. I'm really gonna miss him. The house seems empty. Bye Timber.

Saturday, July 05, 2008

My Fourth

Hope everyone had a happy 4th!

Mine was pretty darn good this year. I hung out with my kids who had told their father (my ex) what we were going to do. So we all hung out together. Unfortunately, my bf didn't join us. I think he likes it more quiet. So he was missing but my energy was mostly focused on the grand baby and my ex's wife's baby. They made the whole night! Their reactions to all the fireworks was so cute. OOOOOs and Oh Man! All night long. The grand baby is 2 and the other is 3. They were so cute. I got some really crappy pictures of the fireworks display we watched. And a pretty good video. And I had a good time. We went out to eat after that and then ended our night.

It wasn't weird at all to hang out with them. My ex and his wife. No one seems to understand much how we even get along. But we do. I feel comfortable. I don't want to do it all the time or much really, but last night was fine. I'm sure something will come up sometime, but for now every thing is okay. This wife is the woman whom he cheated on me with - he ended up marrying her. You know it did bother me back then, but I still knew it wasn't meant for me to be with him. Even as we ended I knew it even then. So maybe that's why.

I did notice one thing, with all this stuff happening at my place, like a few things I'd need a handy man for, I always expect my ex to help - even still. I don't think that's good but I don't seem to want to trust anyone else in that area. I don't know anyone who does that kind of work that I can call. My bf doesn't seem to know all of what I need. Some stuff yes, but not all and what he had been able to help me with, he has. So I do feel uneasy about that within me. And especially now that I hear people are screwing over others who don't know in this carpentry and handyman area...I am even more jumpy and unwilling to call anyone else. I guess that was one area I never had a problem trusting my ex with. That he did well.

Today I am thankful for:
My kids
My grand baby
the relationship I can handle with my ex and his wife
My dogs
My God, who has allowed this to enhance my life instead of letting it tear me up inside
My program which has something to do with the above as well