Speechless

Received some bad news today...I am pretty speechless. Concerning a loved one. I hope it does not continue to progress in the wrong direction. That's all I can utter right now. All I am willing to post.

I am grateful for:
My God
My kids
My Grand baby
My Family
Al-Anon community
The ability to let go and know it will be okay
The ability to do the above and not fight with myself so much about it

Still Here!

Still feeling stuck and things aren't moving still, but I feel better. Maybe this is where I am supposed to be right now...for what reason I don't know, but I'm still here. I guess I need to make it work while I am here. And be grateful I am not in a worse situation, because right now, I could be.

I am feeling stuck...in my life.

Okay still gone for a while. My poor little car is now dead, I really need a major change in my life both professional and financial and I am very slow to make it happen. I have always been that way and I thought that had changed. But to my - somewhat - surprise it is still a bad habit. I am taking care of my diabetes, but the other stuff is what I am hesitating on. Like I can only concentrate on one area at a time. But it needs to be moving faster in the other areas. I am pretty disappointed with myself and I keep getting distracted by frivolous things in my life. They matter, but the financial and professional parts matter more. And I am at a standstill there and while I procrastinate....things are not getting better. I feel stuck in more ways than one and I can't move like I'm stuck in tar or something.

Been gone a minute or two!

Well, its been a very long time since I've been here! I was diagnosed with Diabetes in December and I've been really working on me! Still haven't been to a meeting, still stressed at work, my beau has moved in now, and I am about to start a diet to lose weight so I can get off these meds I'm on! I hope I can do it. The Dr. Ian Four Day Diet. Myself and family members too. I am hoping this will be good to my body! I am doing well on watching what I eat and I am doing well with my blood sugar.

My body is getting used to the lower blood sugars too. It used to affect me when I got into the 300's but now it affects me when it goes into the 200's! I am staying pretty much into my target ranges, 100 - 150 except for some mornings I am over 120. I will see an educator this week so I can figure out what is going on there with my higher numbers in the morning!

I think I really need to get back to my meetings again. I just notice some codependent behavior I want to change or maybe that I just noticed. So I think I need to pick back up my meetings and my daily readings. Well, so much for now!

Elf Dance - starring us!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

This is what gives me joy

This is what gives me joy this weekend. Been spending time with my grandbaby who loves to go to his cousins to play...cousins, right? He is the grandbaby and the two are my sisters kids. Well, whatever! He loves to go play with them.

Still no meeting. But looking to make a change here soon. I feel like I should but I am unsure again. I think I am letting a certain part of my life run wild and I can't seem reign it back in. I can't seem to start the change rolling and I know I need to. So I am starting to take baby steps to change that part of my life. And I need to get back to church! Missing God too...

Stressed and Sick this week

Well, feeling stressed at work again and sick this week, but I am not going to just let it get to me. I am going to do what I can in the time I have been given. There is a lot not getting done. My duties are covered less some filing, but it can wait. But the extra is getting a lot harder to get to. I hate that. It does feel overwhelming. But I can only do what I can and I think I do that well. The extra too if I can get to it!

Still no meeting. I really need to take care of me. My boss is even taking time off and starting to take care of her needs first. So it got me to realizing that I am not. I need to care for me quite a bit right now! I need to see the doctor, dentist, pay bills, clean up around here, and relax! Besides do this side work I was planning on doing for a friend! So much stuff to do. My car is having trouble too but I need more money to handle it. I may just need to change mechanics! I am really thinking that may be my problem with my car.

I want to get back to my meetings but I am so tired at the end of the week. I just stay home. During the summer it was going out and doing things...now I'm just tired. Unless my car is down or something.

Well, back to my life!